Summer is finally here!!

Yes, you read that right. The daily highs are 80 degrees and holding. We're finally done with the pathetic, gray, cold, damp mush that is known as winter in Mississippi. And, as we all know, Mississippi has about 4 days total of spring. The weather blows straight from freeze warnings (last week) to shorts weather (yesterday, which is good because I'm out of clean pants). Hopefully, there won't be any rogue freezes in May either. I love the South. Screw snow, bring on the humidity!

(Warning: Tangent Ahead!)

It's amazing to me that it is still actually snowing in some places and will continue for at least another month. How can people live with snow on the ground for more than half the year?!? I have seen real snow a total of three times in my entire life, not counting the little piddling two inches we get every three years (and we act like this), and you know what? It's cold. And wet. And you have to pretty much change clothes to get warm. Forget that. I am one of those weird things from the deep South that thrives in 90+ temps and 100% humidity. I can work and play soccer in it without batting an eyelash. Now, to set the record straight, you might not want to smell me afterwards, but it's still not that big a deal. But, please, Yankees should not try this down here. You will pass out. You will get heat stroke. I will have to take your wierd-accented ass to the hospital, and frankly, I'd rather just sit on the porch and drink iced tea with you.

All this said, I am the first person to complain the minute the temperature drops below sixty degrees. I put on three layers the second the thermometer hits 40. The entire state goes insane and closes down completely if there is any ice anywhere in the state. There is one snow plow in Jackson, and the garage doors got frozen shut the last time it was needed. Real smart planning there.

But, yay! It is volleyball and swimsuit season. It's warm enough to sleep with the windows open. Frozen cocktails are in order! Hooray for ass-sweat season!

So, yeah, about that...

You might notice the lack of updates this last week. I swear, there were drunk posts. Then I sobered up and read them and realized they made no sense at all and deleted them. Seriously, the most you could glean out of it was that the Escambia Bay area homeless are really hungry. (Sidenote: New game! Hungry, Hungry Homeless! I am so going to hell.) But it was a mucho relaxing week and I got a tan and crab, so all in all it was a success.

I am now all out of fresh ideas.

My life is so glamorous...

I am now learning the nitrogen recovery rates and pros of using poo as fertilizer. Doesn't that sound fascinating? Am I really sure I want to work in a field where poo is a major topic? Don't you think poo is fascinating?

Well, the kitten hasn't come back yet, but I still hear her jingle and meow every now and again, so I'm leaving out food and something is eating it. Maybe she'll decide I'm not that bad. I mean, how much does an animal hate you if it jumps out a second story window just to get away from you? I've considered getting a ferret as a replacement, but then I realized that would be like a $300 investment, and I'm just not ready to lay that much down for something that might decide it doesn't like me and escape down the sink drain. (Don't worry, I don't have a disposal.)

Oh my gosh, the stress! Three major exams and a major assignment due the day before spring break starts. This is definitely not a recipe for good skin and a relaxed Cheryl. I swear, don't these professors realize that I have to be in a swimsuit next week? Cortisol-related zits and weight gain will not sit well with me.

Speaking of spring break (stream of consciousness, anyone?), does anybody know of fun things to do in Pensacola, Florida besides the beach (and you don't have to be 21 to participate in)? I've never been down there in the free-time, vacation sense, so I'm not really sure what's available in case it rains.

And, hey, the hotel has free wireless, so drunk posts! And hungover posts! And sandy posts! Yay!

*This post was brought to you by boredom, hence the lack of an actual post.

This cat is of the Devil...

Well, I definitely named my kitten well (Maleficent).

So, yesterday it's feeling fanfrickingtastic outside so I open the window and lay down to take a little nap. I don't have a screen on this window, but I think nothing of it because it's on the second floor and my kitten sits on the sill everyday watching the squirrels. So, I wake up an hour later and plop down on the couch to watch some American Idol. Another hour later, I hear a faint jingle. I suddenly realize that I haven't seen Maleficent since I fell asleep. Knowing her past history, I begin searching in the most random place I can think of. Behind the couch? Nothing. Under the cabinet? Nope. Behind the water heater? No! So I slowly begin to freak out. Then a bulb comes on. The window! I then realize that jingling I heard was outside. Yes, my six-month-old kitten jumped out the second story window and is outside where she has never been before. (Doesn't bode too well for my future children, huh?) Outside I go, food dish in hand, to try to lure her back. I caught a glimpse of her, but as soon as I tried to move to her, off she went.

So, for the second time in 3 months my cat has run away. I'm still holding out hope that she'll come back or someone will find her because she's got a tag on her collar. My pets hate me. Apparantly my duty in life is to adopt animals, fix them, and set them back into the wild, sterilized and fat.